Tips for Tricky Topics During the Holidays

Every teen knows that one crazy relative whose opinions stir up trouble during holiday get-togethers. With so many varying opinions, controversial topics are bound to be brought up, but with this step-by-step guide, you can easily handle a couple of these subjects. 

1. Politics

Politics is usually the main talking point at holiday dinners, especially between older adults. They love to debate with one another about whose chosen political party is better. We all know that they will never come to a conclusion and that these arguments will last until the day they all die. Sometimes adults will attempt to pull you into the conversation by asking your political opinions. Although tempting, these questions will likely lead to more bickering around the table; instead, follow this guide to diffuse the situation. 

• No one likes to be ignored, so acknowledge that you have heard your relatives’ questions.
• From here you can go one of two ways: if you feel so prompted you can answer the question or you can try to move the conversation in a different direction.
•  If you choose to answer the question, first recognize your relatives’ point-of-view and try to find something that you slightly agree with in their beliefs. Instead of focusing on everything you disagree with, build off of one key idea that you do believe in. Doing this will help you and your relatives meet at a potential middle ground instead of everyone arguing endlessly with each other.
• If you feel as though you will get nowhere by discussing politics, try to bring up a different topic you know your relatives enjoy. People love to talk about themselves, and when someone brings up something that piques their interest, they will ramble on about it for as long as allowed. This will help break the unnecessary tension between you and your relatives, and help those who are pressed on politics move on to something more productive. 

Politics is an especially difficult topic as of late, and sometimes discussing it may not always be the best thing to do. Social media depicts a world where we can cut anyone we don’t agree with out of our lives, but this is not the reality for most people. It is important to remember that everyone is human and we all have our faults, but we must find ways to interact respectfully with our relatives even if we do not agree with them.

2. Plans for the future

Every teenager has that one relative who will endlessly pester you about your plans for the future during family gatherings. Although they mean well, this can be incredibly frustrating for the person on the receiving end, especially if they do not know their plans for the future yet. If you can relate to this perhaps some of these recommendations can assist you in getting through this sometimes bothersome conversation.

• Like the previous section, this conversation can go one of two ways. You may choose to answer the question or you may choose to respond with a different topic.
• If you choose to answer the question, try to have fun with it. Instead of listing off your plans for the future in hopes of getting the conversation over, try and spice it up a bit. Tell your relative other plans you might have that don’t involve your higher education or job. Perhaps you may mention details of your dream house or how many pets you want. This may sound silly, but it could help start something bigger that doesn’t feel like an interrogation from your relatives but an actual conversation. If you’re feeling extra, you could ask the same question of your relative, and they may share their plans for the future. This could help strengthen your relationship or break up an awkwardness that may have formed between you and a relative you haven’t seen in a long time.
• The second option is to dodge the question about your plans for the future and bring up something else. Try to move the conversation away from the topic, or ask your relative a new question. One example of this may be asking a relative what their plans consisted of when they were your age. Asking a relative about their experiences will help bring the attention off of you, but also may give you a few ideas on starting a new chapter in your life
• The future is full of unknowns, and it is completely understandable if you still need to figure out what you’d like to do with your life. It is important to give yourself time to grow and still enjoy childhood. Relatives may push you to have your whole life planned, but this is just not necessary.  

The holidays are a difficult time for everyone, especially people who have to balance interactions with family members who don’t share their own beliefs, while also trying to stay true to themselves. The internet preaches that we can remove everyone who we don’t agree with out of our lives, but many do not have that privilege. We will always be forced to interact with people who share different beliefs, whether we like it or not. That said, it is vitally important to set clear boundaries while also staying respectful. However, you must take time for yourself as well. Being around people can be draining, and trying to please everyone will end up depleting your social battery. The holidays are known for their hustle and bustle, but we must make time for relaxation. So whether you are traveling or staying in, make time for balance during this holiday season, and remind Aunt Sharon that you don’t need to know whether you are going to medical school seeing that you’re 15.